What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
