he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
