I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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