Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
