When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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