I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
ttyl tear gas
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
