just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
