420 ftw
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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