I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
