i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
