Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
4 words: hood of his car
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
