What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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