i need an iv and a liver transplant
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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