just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
how does that bad decision feel?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
