i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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