At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Of course I have a pirate flag
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize