I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
