mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
