Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize