when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Randomize
