I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Randomize
