if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
