Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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