She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
There are leaves in my underwear?
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