tell your sister to shave her snatch
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
