Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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