I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize