Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
