Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
