Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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