My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
