6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
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