butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
