I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
