I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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