Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
