So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
