i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize