He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
