she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
