I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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