When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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