She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize