My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize