so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
