either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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