I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
