is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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