i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
