and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
literally had 100 drinks last night.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
